“Why?”

You must really hate me
Is all I can think these days

Why? I don't understand
What have I done
To deserve such
Cold disregard

Is it time to say goodbye?
I pray not, I truly pray not
Yet sometimes I wonder
If you already have

Have my years of waiting
Been nothing more
Than one long goodbye
From you
That I refuse
To hear?

You've pushed me away
And blocked me out, boy
You sure went to great lengths
it seems, to do so

I believed you, I still do
I trusted you, and I still do
I believed in us; not sure If I still do
Because it doesn't seem that you do too

What have I done
To make you hate me?
Why do you want this
Whole damn thing to be
As difficult and as painful
As possible for me?

Why do you hate me?
What did I ever do to you
Besides love you?

These days I tell God just take me,
Please, just take me home
For surely I don't belong here
It's painfully clear
There's simply no place
For me here

I once hoped that place
Could be your heart
But there's clearly no room
For me in there

You've made that clear
With the space you've created
In lieu of me

~*~
08/25/06

Copyright © 2006 Brenda Barnhart. All Rights Reserved.
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“These days I tell God just take me,
Please, just take me home
For surely I don't belong here
It's painfully clear
There's simply no place
For me here

I once hoped that place
Could be your heart
But there's clearly no room
For me in there”

Brenda Barnhart